you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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