What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
He kissed a someone with a penis
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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