But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Randomize
