sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I'm eating all of the evidence.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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