and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
