i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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