the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
