I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
