The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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