were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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