make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize