I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
