You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
