careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
it's like iHOP with fire
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
