he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I wish i was in the wii world.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Randomize
