is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
