But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Randomize
