Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize
