Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
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