she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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