She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
it glows. i had to have it.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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