Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
