So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
