Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Randomize
