she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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