u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
