We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Oh god it's open bar.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
