If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
