I don't usually arrange sex via text message
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Randomize
