He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Randomize
