how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Sex in the backyard? Check.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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