At least make sure they are 18
Why
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize