i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
