Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
