I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
