Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize