I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
