just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
