I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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