ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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