Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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