I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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