I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize