its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
