i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize