Don't make out with my wife yet
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
