if i died would you start the facebook group?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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