If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
