4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
