you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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