Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize